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Six Impossible things

(Your interaction requested at the end!)

The life of a creative person flows in tides.  We know that.  We create easily one day and with great friction the next.  We immerse ourselves in the project and then abandon it like the cat that won't quit peeing on the rug... then back to love with it.

I've beaten myself up many times for unfinished projects, but today I'm looking for new lenses to see the tide-ness of my energy.  Here's what I've got so far:

When I am loving on a creation, I am fully there... and when I am with a friend, I am fully there.  I'm not half way anyplace most of the time.  That's the shiny side of the coin.  

Then, there's the side that needs some polishing from time to time.  

In my life I have taken a dose or two of flack for "disappearing", leaving people wondering what I'm doing in my life that makes me unavailable to share in all the fun they're having.  The flack was always good natured, the sort of jokes that held truth that the speaker needed to communicate without hurting my feelings.  The kind where you, the punch line, laugh and then either defend yourself or change yourself.  

I've done both.  High tide.  I've defended my allegiance to the rabbit hole that calls my name, reminding friends that I usually do call them back when I bounce out.  I've proudly asserted that the phone rings on my end so I can choose whether or not I should answer it.  If I was supposed to answer a call every time, there would just be a speaker in the wall where people who needed to contact you could just start talking to you anytime they felt like it.  

And... Low tide.  At some point I heard in the jibes that my lack of availability was hurtful to people I love, that maybe I'd gone overboard on the whole rabbit-hole-expedition, and that perhaps it was time to join the ranks of most everyone else I know who answers the phone every time it rings.  So, for a while, even if I was tucked away in the basement grooving on an idea, I'd jump up and answer... or else I'd sit there feeling guilty.  And it's no secret what guilt does to the creative process.  (If you don't know the secret... think Weed B'Gone after it hits the posies.)  

So, return to High tide?  At the moment it seems like one of the six impossible things to dream of.  Summer is here.  Plans are pouring in from all over.  Little boys need parks.  Friends need outings.  

The impossible part is that I want the rabbit hole AND the outings and gatherings and conversations.

So, today I dedicate the next two weeks to Alice's Queen.  If I'm truly going to inhabit the rabbit hole, I must  embrace the wisdom found there.  

And you?  Send me a comment telling me one of YOUR impossible things you want to believe!


Comments

  1. PamJune 16, 2010 at 3:39 PM

    OK Little Missie, before breakfast I choose to believe that I am an unlimited source of creativity which insures every project I tackle turns out spectacularly well; every piece I choose to write is Pulitzer Worthy; all the while the rest of my world maintains its own order-as in the dishes wash themselves, the shelves keep dust at bay, floors resist all manner of dirt, dust, and grime. Did I mention the part about unlimited funds and resources to underwrite this creative life? Well there is that, too. This is the rabbit hole I care to fall into....I am pretty sure I am not alone in this one! Thanks again for keeping us on our creative toes.

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